Dear (name redacted),

It has come to my attention that, after numerous attempts by you, over the course of years and multiple social media platforms, you cannot ‘let go’ of our relationship.

Facebook, Instagram, and not even LinkedIn were safe. There are no bounds to your insistence on contacting me for a random multitude of ‘reasons.’

I will remind you that this relationship began 21-ish years ago when I was 19 and you were 25, and lasted five-ish years.

For years now, you have sent texts attempting to connect to convey topics, similar to the outline below.

17 years after we broke up:

You sent me an email entitled, ‘In Conclusion,’ which had approximately 50 pictures or videos attached, all of a sexual nature of myself, along with an extended version of, ‘In our last communication, I stated that of all the girls I ever dated, you were the one I thought about most. . .I will delete them (the pictures) after sending this email. The past is the past. Anyway, we had our good times and bad times. We were together for a time and lived in a big city, and it was cool.’

To which I never replied, but you followed up on through text a few months later, with a ‘hello.’ Usually around 3a. I will remind you here that you have been married, with kids, for over a decade at this point. 

22 years after we started dating, 18 years after we broke up: 

You emailed me, again, at your strangely early/late hour (this time at 5a), to state some ‘Facts and Truths.’ Your words, not mine. 

In this email, you felt it necessary to state that (and I’ll quote):

1. “I didn’t move out of town on my own, but that you brought me.
2. I didn’t get in to a specific college because I was rejected.
3. You cheated on me twice in our home state before we moved.

You then went on to say,’ wow, that feels better. I feel good. Setting the record straight. Now that’s cathartic. Ok, good luck and god speed.’ All your words. Not mine. 

Signed,

(name redacted)”

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I have continuously deleted your texts, DM’s and emails with no response as I can’t be bothered. But since you insist on continuously putting things in writing, here we are. And I will, out of the goodness of my heart, help you to continue in your endeavor to ‘set the record straight.’

Dear (name redacted), let’s go.

1. The amount of unbothered that I am by literally anything that you could say to me is unmatched. Pending your revealing that you had exposed me to some sort of incurable disease, there is nothing that you can tell me that would concern me in the absolute least amount. We dated two decades ago. TWO DECADES. To say,’I’m good,’ is an understatement. 
2. Addressing the move to another state. I paid my own way, and was much more financially ready to do so, than you. Which means I brought myself. I will say that I, in my mature way of dealing with the world and the myriad of exes that have been thrown my way, have started looking at you all in terms of ‘what did I gain from dating so-and-so?’ In your case, you helped get me to (city redacted). Would I have done it on my own? No, that would not have been safe. 
3. I am so thankful for you bringing up infidelity. I cheated on you four times. I think? Sexually, twice while I was on vacation. Once while you were out of town for the holidays (but that was just making out with someone in our bed for an entire weekend). And once, again sexually, with my boss at the time. This last one was an ongoing sexual relationship that was basically every friday after work, and spanned the last six months or so of our relationship, and then some. This doesn’t include all of the times that your sister and I made out. She regularly took comfort in having me over to her apartment (after we all moved out, of course) while she was missing her boyfriend, who had recently moved out of town. It’s funny because, at the time, you lived in the building next door to her. But you both chose to live so close to me, that it was convenient for she and I to stay close. You probably could have seen me going to her building. Weird. 

All of your follow up and essentially stalking, over multiple platforms for the last few years has been less than fun and leads me to be more than happy with the fact that I broke up with you 18 years ago. Yes, I broke up with you. Remember? When I wanted to move out? That was breaking up. 

At the end of the day you (at the time of this writing), are a 50-year old man that continuously lashes out at the past, and 20-year old me. You have kids that age. Pretty sure taty you have daughters that age. I would hope that you have taught  them to stand up for themselves against people like you. And hopefully taught them to avoid people like you. 

And maybe, just maybe even consider removing the battery of their cars to prevent them from sneaking out at night to go see someone like you. Like my mom did.

(November 2024)